When a tall cool drink of water just won't do

Saturday, September 10, 2005

Learning my way around...

Well, I've had 6 days on the new job and so far....Its ok. I feel like I haven't really done anything...And who can complain about that. They have slowly begun to train me, but still I am not allowed to actually do anything on my own. I just sit and watch. And the colleague training me is on vacation next week....So who knows what I will do next week. But its not bad.

...And Thursday morning I was was getting out of my car and Stunningly Handsome Man approached me to ask me if he was parked in the correct parking lot. Apparently he too is a new employee....And he works in the same building I do....hubba hubba.

After walking together into work, I made sure to make an impression on him. I scurried up from my office to seek him out, delivering to him my addition copy of the parking rules and regulations. Sweet ain't I? Well he had nice hands...and, ok, a cute hiney. What can I say, I wanted another peek.

Of course Friday morning I did not have as pleasant an experience with SHM. He did approach me in the morning to say hello but we were quickly interrupted by 2 of his department member. They stood and discussed business in front of me for a few minutes and then walked away, without even a good bye...So rude.

But it hasn't been all bad...I could stand to watch him walk away. He does have a nice ass.

Thursday, September 01, 2005


....I started a new job at another university today. My first full time job in 5 years. Although I did nothing there today but sign some tax forms...Im exhausted and have to be up again at 5 tomorrow...so...ill fill you all in in my next post.

My lost summer

I know I know, I just havent been around. The summer wasnt exactly lost, I was just incredibly overwhelmed. But the summer has passed and there is a whole new world on the horizon. Life will be different now. Very different. You know that feeling you get when you arrive home from a very long vacation...or that first return trip home from college...everything is familiar, everything is the same but there is something surreal about it all. well...now you know where I am....

Sunday, June 19, 2005

The last month of 30 in review and in the key of Dr. Suess:

No call from St. Johns...
My boss is a bitch....
Broke as can be...
My hives really itch.

A car I rear-ended...I slipped off the brake....
In less than 3 hours, I'll frost my own cake...

A ticket for no seat belt...
A big shiney welt...right in my mouth...from my last tuna melt.

As for the exhibit, it wasnt so bad...except for that Historical Perv...
who told me I'm fat. Yeah he's got some nerve.

The bloated old geezer....like my feeling he'd hurt?
He'd better wize up and keep his eyes off her shirt.

My 14 year-old cousin, I warned her.... he's dirty.
She better stop smiling, HP'll think she's flirting.

But today, with their dads ....my friends are all occupied
While my thoughtful father is planning his Father's Day ride

So a car show I'll go and spend it with too many Earles
not exactly the gift I had hoped for...my birthstone is pearls

No one asked what I wanted...
No one will care what I get...
and the weatherman says the day will be wet,

hot, sticky, and humid. I'll turn thirty one.
It better get better or im buying that gun

I used to vote for control...
I used to pray to be strong...
but if you ask me today...
5 days is too long.

Thursday, June 02, 2005

More than I could chew....

Last Wednesday night, about a half hour before I was about to leave work, my bosslady calls me and asks me to come see her.

When I get to her, she proceeds to give me a task and explain in detail how to do this job step by step by step by step. Mind you I have been employed at the same job for 4 and half years and in that time have probably don’t this same job task or at least 100 times.

So even though she has spoken to me like I'm an imbecile many many times before, this time it was a little different...

AS she closes her instructional lecture she says to me:

"I know I just gave you the job of An Acquisitions Librarian and you hate that but....well...Bite me."

Acquisitions librarian is not in my job description, but biting people is most definitely not what I was hired to do.

Now in hindsight, I should have lurched out and bit the woman, but I didn’t. Primarily because if I am going to be required to bite people, I need a raise, at the very least I should have health benefits. Don't you agree?

Tuesday, May 31, 2005

The Potato Salad Review

Well, I didn't attend the family shindig on Monday, but the potato salad made it there and isn't that what really matters? From what I am told the potato salad went over well. Apparently it is true what they say, that arsenic is barely discernible to the human palette.

Monday, May 23, 2005

No small potatoes

I've now made the mistake of telling my stepmother that I am making German potato salad next weekend for 2 different BBQs. Since I made the announcement, she has asked me about the potatoes 3 times in the past 18 hours....8 of which she was asleep for.

"Only the eastern potatoes are on sale. What kind do you need? Can you use eastern potatoes? You better ask grandma!"

I don't know when it was determined that she was buying the potatoes. Its my damn potato salad. I'm capable of buying potatoes.

And does it really really matter why kind of potatoes I use?

Why do I have to ask grandma? She gave me the recipe, I'm good. I can handle it from here. Stop asking me about the fucking potatoes. I'll take care of it. I'm 30 years old, I can take care of potato salad.

What is the fucking crisis? Its just potato salad.